blog about blogging

Sadly I'm to the point where I don't know what I want to talk about and it's only my 5th entry. I hope I've done a good job so far. Maybe I should stop worrying about what to blog about and let it happen. Before I started this endeavor I thought about all sorts of things I'd write about. Inevitably I did all this thinking right before I went to bed. You know what that's like? What sounded brilliant while your head is on the pillow sounds idiotic the next morning while you're rinsing out the shampoo in your hair (which half the time I forget if I shampoo'd my hair or not).

I have had many a great movie scripts I was going to write about while I let slumber take over me only to think "Gigli" was a better movie the over a bowl of Frosted Flakes. I've had inventions go from "Shark Tank" worthy to more like toilet bowl worthy as I piss another one away. I've had grand ideas become boring ideas all within a snore session.

But I gotta think there are some really good ideas that happen at night (as long as it doesn't involve taking money out of an ATM). Axl prolly wrote "Sweet Child of Mine" after watching the 10 o'clock news right? Harry Potter had to be after a dark, thunderstorm rolled through. "Inception" was dreamt of at night for sure and "Twilight" - it's in the title! So there have to be some really good ideas that pan out from a late night think session.

I'll just let it flow. This will be my personal, unscripted blog battle and someday there will be a loosely-based-on-actual-events movie about me struggling in the 'burbs with 3 kids and a baby mama who likes to gamble our fortune at bingo night. I'm blogging away on my rickety laptop missing half the keys as the city bus takes me to my 3M factory job where I become addicted to the smell of tape. I have run-ins with my racist neighbor named Walt who countless times yells at my kids to stay off his lawn. I befriend him by bringing over some eggrolls and show him my blog. He likes them both and tells me "You're not like other asian fellas." I accept his back-handed compliment. Sadly the next day he chokes on a leftover eggroll and dies, but not after he changes his will and bequeaths me his favorite car... a Grand Am. I write a song about the events that transpire...

His palms are sweaty, all week his minds been heavy
There's comments 'bout his blog already, his dotcom's so cleverly
He's nervous, but on the surface he looks calm and ready to drop blogs,
but he keeps on forgettin what he jot down,
the whole internet goes so loud
He opens his lap top, but the words won't come out
He's bloggin' how, everyone's doggin' him now
The thoughts run out, wi-fi's over, bloah!
Snap back to the twin cities, Oh there goes longevity
Oh, there goes Walt, he choked
He's so dead, but he won't give up that
Easy, eggroll
He shouldn't have eaten it, he knows his whole back's to these ropes
It don't matter, he's toast
He knows that, but he'll post
like he's at his own roast
When he goes back to his residential home, that's when it's
Back to the Queen again yo
Bohemian Rhapsody
He better go capture this moment and hope it don't pass him


[Hook:]
You better lose yourself in the music, the moment
You own it, you better never let it go
You only get one shot, do not miss your chance to blog
This opportunity comes once in a lifetime yo
(You better)


No more games, I'ma change what you call rage
Swearing off these apps like Angry Birds caged
I was playing in the beginning, the levels all changed
they've been blown up and slingshot and flew off stage
But I kept trying and resettin' the next flyer
Best believe I'll get one star higher
All the pain inside subsides when I pass
the next level, my son and I high-five
And I can't decide the right type of flight for my birds
Cause man, this game would be awesome with bats and snipers
But it's no Batman movie, there's no Michelle Pfieffer, this is my life
And these games are so hard, and it's getting even harder
Trying to clean up my touch screen, plus
Teeter totter caught up between being a father and a premier blogger
kids screaming on and on
Too hard for me to comment
Stay in hot spots, another night of playing
Has gotten me to the point, I've grown stale
I've got to formulate a thought, another mixed pale ale and shot
Success is my only freaking option, failure's not
Fingers fail me not this may be the only opportunity that I got

[Hook:]
You better lose yourself in the music, the moment
You own it, you better never let it go
You only get one shot, do not miss your chance to blog
This opportunity comes once in a lifetime yo
(You better)

Still looking for a movie title.

Moral of the story is "never blog at night."